Missing Home :(

I am missing my family so much these days. I want to go home and stay there for a long time without any interruptions/duties etc. I wish I could rewind my life and live the peaceful, happy time that I spent with them. That life was more balanced with work and comfortable ppl around, ppl who loved me for what I am. I had my mom and sis nearby to vent out my fear, angry, insecured feelings etc. Had ppl who listened to me whatever I blabber. I need not worry if they would mistake me if I shout at them. I even scold my mom and get along easily in a couple of days. Even if I dont talk to her, she begins with "kutty raaja, I love you" while getting me coffee/snacks.

We bought a fan this weekend, and it was good to sleep with the silent breeze blowing to the face constantly. I am a kind of person who wakes up as soon as the fan is switched off in the room. my mom uses this technique during the weekend when I sleep for a long time. I remembered all these when I got the air from the fan and slept. When I got up the next day morning, before I opened my eyes, for a sec, I thought I was at my home and I had a smile and was thinking that my sis would be sleeping in the bed and I could see my mom in the other room when I sit up. When I woke up, I didnt know where I was and couldnt control my tears for not seeing my ppl around.

Reason for all these: my mom and sis are moving from Hyd to Chennai next week finally to live with my brother. My brother has got a better job and he is in a position to support my family. All for good, I know. I could not take the fact that my family will not be there in Hyd when I go back and I started feeling lonely since then :'( The shifting was in our plan but it kept postponing for some reasons. So I wasnt serious when I came here. But things got changed and here is the shifting.

My sis is taking care of all the shifting work. Avangha thaniya elaam panrathae enaku kashtama iruku. I know she has to learn all these and she is really capable of doing this. but still, I was always there with them in all the majority tasks that happened at home. "Odambu thaan ingha iruku, manasu motham angha thaan iruku" -- I am literally going through this. I dont feel like talking to anyone :'(